..2/23 finally came..

..guess what..

i finished my paper!!!!

..after 5 hours on saturday, 10 hours on monday, 4 hours today, and some additional hours throughout january i finally got it done..

..goodbye monday..

..it's almost done. 7 hours later. good thing today was a holiday and i didn't have to work. tender mercy i tell you..

..hello saturday..

..welcome to my saturday..

..it's been stupendous. i love when my saturdays are full of typing, reading, researching, sour starbursts, and no fun. don't worry though i get to conclude the evening with grocery shopping. it'll be the highlight of my day. literally..

..he's so good..

..so we're sitting here, matt and i of course, at uvu doing homework. we can't do homework at home. more so..I can't do homework at home. which leads to the point of this post.

matt is so good at being good.

if that makes any sense at all? he's so disciplined and focused. if he knows he needs to get something done, he just does it. no hesitation (at least not any that i'm aware of), no distraction, none of the -get up, do this, do that, come back, facebook stalk, check the blog, write a blog post, you tube gwyneth paltrow glee videos, find random students and discuss love languages, take the love language test, taste jelly beans, get up again, hang out by the water cooler by yourself, go to the bathroom 4 times, look in all the places other than the most obvious for a highlighter-kind of business. i on the other hand...i'm supposed to be working on my paper (by the way it's due in less than 6 days) but instead i've done all that kind of business listed up top and wasted 2 hours of my life. all the while matt sits quietly with his head phones in his ears jamming out to dashboard confessionals while he configures some sort of math equation to save the world using a wheel rim (he attempts to explain what it is he does but i look at him like he looks at me when i show him how i use photoshop...we just don't get it).

ps-totally just got busted. we're on separate sides of the room but he still always knows exactly what i'm doing. i wish i was more like him. not so easily distracted. i think i'm responsible but man oh man my brain has had it with school work and i want to be anything but responsible. honestly, you'd think i'd just want to get this over with (which i do) mostly because of the anxiety i feel when i think about it and the stomach acid the churns away inside making it hard to breathe (i need to remember to explain that another day). knowing all of that will go away once i'm done should be motivation enough but..nope. it's just not doing it.

..oh well..life will go on right?..

..by the way i'm equal on all of the love languages except for receiving gifts i only had a 1 on that. matt's love languages are equal on physical touch and quality time. i got him to take 2 minutes and take the quiz. i feel quite accomplished for the evening..

..it's 4:58 pm again..

..well its that time of the day again..
..4:58 PM..
..2 minutes away from the end of another work day..
..i love my job but today it was hard to find motivation to do anything. i helped a few students, sat through a student council meeting, went to hobby lobby on a quest to find a magnet board for my office, broke a vase while i was there, played cupid for a couple students that i think would be a cute couple, text matt, missed a call from mi madre. i even made time to go to lunch at cafe paesan, which i've decided i really don't like that much. all in all..not too productive. now do you know what i get to do? my integrative paper. i am THRILLED to do that tonight. and currently i would say that my definition of thrilled would be LOATHING. i hate this paper so much...if anyone would like to write a large research paper about the use of technology in higher education please please volunteer. i already have a title for you..

..burnt out like burnt toast..

..today i feel like i'm sitting inside a toaster. i'm on the verge of some serious burn out. did you know that my integrative paper is due TWO WEEKS from today? no bueno. i'm not even going to say how far i am along. am i freaking out? you betcha. totally freaking out. do i have time to write this paper? no. am i going to need to take a couple days of work to make sure it gets done? yep. will my stress level increase because if i take time off work there's the catch up factor that will be there when i come back? surely. are my students driving me crazy? yes. do i feel like a bad advisor because of it? sometimes. do i worry about them too much? possibly. am i ready for a new set? today i am. do i still like working with them? ya. will this all go away in two weeks when i turn in my paper? i don't know. i hope so. but school will still continue until the end of april. which is fine. but then that whole should i walk in graduation or not questions comes into play. not that thats stressful but i'm so done with school that i'm way done with school. do i sound crazy? wouldn't be surprised if i do..

..how blessed are we..

..last tuesday i got a phone call from a dear friend from washington. a woman i love called to tell me that she was being baptized into the church of jesus christ of latter-day saints on sunday. so after a little research on the world wide web i found an amazing deal on plane tickets and a phone call to my adorable husband we were on our way to washington. it was a great trip full of visits and memories..

..it was great to be at jessica's baptism and definitely something i'm glad i didn't miss. i'm so proud of her, the decision she's made, and the hard work, dedication, and effort she's put in to prepare for that great occasion. she has an amazing testimony of the Savior and eternal families. i'm thrilled for their future as a family..

..we also got to see many others that matt and i love and adore. it was fun to reflect and laugh about things that have happened with people that have impacted each of our lives so much. i LOVE that we served in the same mission. it was AWESOME to meet and visit with people matt worked with, lived with, and loved on his mission..

..there are times where my heart yearns to be in washington. to see the green, to be with the people, to be doing what i did for 18 months. it was much needed and we hope we get to go back soon..